For Josh: The Day You Were Born

At midnight on October 11, 2011 your dad and I headed to San Antonio Community Hospital to have you delivered. I couldn't believe that the 9 months of agony were finally coming to an end! I always believed that I would have a Hell of a time delivering you because delivering your sister was so easy and perfect. There was no way I'd be that lucky twice. I was actually more scared and anxious the second time around!

Anyway, I was admitted to the hospital and was put on Pitocin to induce my contractions around 1:30am. It took a while for the contractions to actually start coming regularly. Hours passed and there were still few signs that you were on your way, so your dad and I slept as much as we could that night.


My contractions became regular around 7am, after the nurse's shift change. Unfortunately, the night nurse never asked me when I wanted an epidural to ease the pain. When the day nurse asked me why I was waiting to get it, I told her I thought I had to be closer to delivering to get it. NO! I could have gotten it at any time, so she immediately had me sign off the authorization for the epi and said that the anesthesiologist would be here as soon as he was finished with a c-section. Ten minutes passed and now all of a sudden it seemed that you were determined to come. Soon. Like real quick. 


Another 10 minutes passed and the pain was getting really bad. Where was the anesthesiologist?! Will he get here soon? After another 10 minutes, the pain was so bad, I felt like I just wanted to die. I was on my side begging for any kind of pain killer, but it was too late. The nurse checked me and you were ready to come out. This couldn't be happening. Not to me. I NEEDED an epidural. I screamed "NO NO NO NO!!!" with every contraction. I was told to resist the urge to push until the obstetrician arrived. I think even the nurse was freaking out at how quickly you wanted to come out! Finally, Dr. Johnson arrived. Just in time to hear me scream at the top of my lungs, still begging for the epidural that I knew I was not going to get. He said forget the epi, you're delivering this baby now. I couldn't. I kept saying I can't, I can't. But really, did I have a choice? Dr. Johnson wasn't the charming and funny guy this time that he was when Rachel was born. He must have had a long night because he was very short with me (he said screaming wouldn't help the situation, even though to me it seemed like it did), but I think that's what I needed to get me in the right state of mind to get you the heck out. He said I could do it in 5 minutes or 50, it's up to me. Well, ok then, 5 minutes sounds damn good. 


So with the next contraction I began to push you out. Your big ol' head came out and everyone in the room got all excited. Easy for them! I was still in the most horrible pain of my life! I think it was the nurse that said with the next push it will all be over. That was the best news I'd heard all day. I was ready. So with another push I felt every curve of your little body coming through. And that was that. You were born at 8:22am. Everyone in the room again was all excited and congratulating me, complimenting me. Dr. Johnson laid you on top of me and the first thing I said to you was "wow, you're a little chubby." Sorry, it's just the first thing that popped into my head when I saw your fat little arm on me. You weighed 8lbs, 6oz. Big boy! 

I know how you feel, darlin'. This was me only 10 minutes before.

Anyway, I know it's a cliché, but in the end, it was all worth it. You have made my life complete and I wouldn't change anything. Well, ok, I would definitely get an epi if I had to do it all over again, but that's about it.

Both of us getting some much needed rest after that ordeal.